In Which The Bitch Hits Back

Dear Diary,

I tried to approach today like the new me I said was going to be. I wasn’t going to put up with Vincent’s shit anymore. I wasn’t going to overthink what I’m doing with Caleb. I’m just going to go with the flow. I’m going to move like water, stop resisting everything, and learn to live in the moment. Because anything else will kill me.

And then today happened. I was getting to school when I saw Vincent walking over to the car where Caleb and some of the guys were. They were talking, which really is never good, and then suddenly Caleb went flying out of the car through the window. Vincent was galring down at him. What the fuck has he done now? What did he do? Go bargain for more powers?

The insurmountable rage inside of me began to boil the surface and I found myself suddenly there and involved. I struck out and punched Vincent. That new found power ran through me and I knew I had hurt him. The problem was, I felt good about it. Something inside of me began to blossom and the rage increased. I think it was my own surprise at myself that stopped me from hitting him again and again. But I wanted to. I wanted to push him to the ground and smash his head against the pavement. Fuck. I think I wanted to kill him.

I stood listening to the meeting about what had happened. Vincent tried to blame Caleb. Like he does. Like he always did. Blame someone else. I Shut him down and then he walked off in a saddened state. Chantel had told him the truth. I wasn’t interested in rehashing it. Fuck this. I’m done with this drama. Caleb said thanks for defending him and I shrugged. I didn’t want to commit to anything. But being around him quiets the rage inside of me.

Chantel said Vincent can’t hurt anyone anymore. Pieces of the necklace I gave her were all over the ground. There was a brief moment when I wanted to cry. I swallowed hard and moved on. I was too busy focusing the rage inside of me to let the necklace bother me. It was official then. That life was over. Time to move on.

Turns out Sasha, the girl Caleb was apparently trying to kidnap (he’s such an idiot sometimes), was the daughter of someone connected to Natalie and the old bitch was spying on us all. I didn’t get what difference that made, since Natalie was mostly harmless and if she wanted to kill us, she could. So why bother worrying about it? There was nothing she could learn that would be harmful.

So we decided to go to class.

Listen